Neurodiverse is what all humans are - you, me, everyone - we all think and behave slightly differently from one another - and this is a good thing for many reasons - from an evolutionary standpoint - if we didn't have those daring ancestors who risked going out into the world we wouldn't have discovered half the things we have done along the way. Conversely if we didn't have the cautious "plan for the worst" people we wouldn't have been able to survive the cold winters (both literal and metaphorical). Diversity is how a species survives - but diversity is also how a species thrives.
Neurodiversity describes how people experience and interact with the world around them in many different ways. We have diversity in our ways of thinking, puzzle solving, approaching tasks, way of talking, how we like to collaborate with others, etc. This framing comes with the understanding that there is no one "right" way of thinking, learning, and behaving. And this is the most important part - your way of doing things is just that - it's your way. No judgment, just a description. Now this doesn't preclude that a particular way of doing something will be quicker, more efficient or subjectively better - I say subjective as this too can depend on your framing of something - mass production is better at producing things vs the artisan, but mass production isn't necessarily better for the environment.
So now that you have a sense of what I'm talking about let's talk labels -
Labels are only as useful as they are useful - Now there will be some people who might hate that sentence and there will be others who will get what I mean straight away - again no judgment, just describing the curve of diversity - so what do I mean by this - Well, do labels open doors for you? Do they help heighten or even deepen your experiences? Have they helped you find a community and support that you might not have had previously? GREAT! Then use them and give others permission to use them in relation to you - if that feels right for you?
Personally I'm not sure how I feel about labels - part of my resistance to labels is how others might react to them - most, if not all labels currently in use give the framework as a deficit - for instance as a Dyslexic, people will assume I struggle to read or I can't spell - whilst this might be the case I prefer to think of the strengths I have - because, let's face it - who wants to go around thinking about what they can't achieve or struggle with all the time. Would you like to go around thinking each day "I struggle to hold my breath underwater - why can't I do it - all the others can do it way longer!" - I'm guessing most of us wouldn't like to focus on that daily - but I'd like to acknowledge that there will be some people on the diversity curve that turn that thinking into motivation to get better at holding their breath - so again, coming back to this idea of what's useful for you personally - to label or not to label - that is the question.
I do have a formal diagnosis of Dyslexia - personally I'd like to rename it "super visual puzzle mind" - because who wouldn't want a title like that? Well, if we're thinking about diversity, possibly some introverts perhaps? Whatever label we give it I feel it’s a more human approach to look at the positives of what your neurodiversity has to offer - For Dyslexics there's a great article here that lists the strengths that our brain wiring boosts compared to others.
Another label I don't have officially is ADD - and until a month ago it wasn't on my radar as something I might have - the reason being was my entire life I have inadvertently managed to find jobs and a career that leant heavily into my skillset - being creative, spontaneous and have the ability to hyper focus (when it's something interesting to me). I'm currently a counsellor who's being creative in the room using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) framework, working with the client's parts of self, being able to focus on the client and their inner and external worlds. It complements my natural abilities.
An aside: Having just read that out loud I realise some people may not want to have a hyper focus on them in the room - but another unofficially diagnosed label I might have is I'm on the HSP spectrum/soup (a phrase I’ve magpied from a more human way of looking at Autism) - HSP = highly sensitive person - so I also have a lot more mirror neurons than the statistical average person, and as a result I'm highly empathetic - so those two factors combined means I try to find a way to meet clients where they need to be and not led by my hyper focus - in fact being highly empathic might have masked some of my traits that fall under the ADD label. There is another possible scenario here - I might not even have ADD, merely a few of the collective indicators - so I am certainly holding this label lightly - but what I did find was when I read the ADD self-assessment quizzes for Adults in the book ‘Delivered from Distraction' by Edward M. Hallowell and John Ratey, the questions described many things that resonated with me. It was like someone laying an architect's blueprint over my life and what they were describing fitted pretty well within the parameters of how I experienced and interacted with the world around me. As a result I had many lightbulb moments of “oh - that's why I did those things!” and “Ah that's why I struggled in that situation but excelled in that other one!"….and now I have that framework it helps me have better conversation with those around me - I have language to describe it so they aren't potentially offended as they inadvertently misinterpret my social cues - it's great - so whilst I don't have the official label of ADD it has certainly unlocked things for me.
Now I should also say at this point that I'm not a medical practioner and don't have the capabilities to give myself or anyone else a formal diagnosis - so if any of this resonates with you and you are curious, please speak to a professional in that field - go through your GP - but also, please do look at the info here and make a decision for yourself - it's about what will help you in your world.
Why am I sharing this personal journey and musings today you might wonder? Well first of all its Neurodiversity Celebration week this week so what better way to celebrate it than to put a human touch to this journey of understanding - it’s been a journey for me and I hope that this little drop in an ocean ripples and helps others find their own voice. I hope it starts dialogue that helps society and the medical world shift away from deficit focused language towards a strength based framework. I hope it ignites a revolution in the school system that leads to change that supports all brain types. I hope we end up in a society that gives us the choice to know our brain types, and then it can hand us the tools in which we will all be able to excel in anything we choose.
For example you could have a framework that has brain type red, blue, green or yellow (notice the flat label structure there - no one type is privileged). If you're brain type red you're a visual learner so you're given the videos that are the visual edition of the written lectures your type green brain colleagues would be reading about. Red types might need colour overlays if they have to read something so you would be able to get tested for that and that would all be integrated in our education systems before you even start! That's my hope for our future - Hey, you've got to hope and strive for something right? So I'm putting this out there in the hope others might also be part of that change I would like to see.
That's pretty much it from me today - a final few thoughts before I go…
There will be some who have struggled to read this as my neurodiversity tends to jump around topics and zoom in and zoom out on particular issues. I even got my partner to read this to see if it made sense to them (it mainly did), but after chatting with her I made some changes, she made some changes (as she's an awesome copy editor). I've also included an audio recording of this as I know I prefer to listen to audiobooks rather than read. Connected with that - as a Dyslexic, I find it interesting that I have found myself in a text based counselling service and even stranger that I love to write a lot - but I think of it as a speech - I'm talking to you right now, my audience - it helps my brain focus and I feel I am better able to convey my message - I wish someone at school helped me unlock this earlier - I've even read it out loud several times to make sure it flowed well and made sense (to me).
So my final thought here today is - the next time you approach something - notice what your instinct go-to method is. Notice if it's the same as the others in the group you're working with. If other people are doing things differently to how you would have done the task or you feel they aren't communicating something with you at all, or in a way that's not useful to you - take a second and think about our chat here today. Get curious about them and their methodology – name your “I” (adapted from ‘The book you wish your parents had read’ by Phillipa Perry) - “I’m curious, can you tell me what you’re doing” or “I’d like to understand why you did something in a particular way” – always keeping in mind that it may come across as judgmental, so be kind and think “would I be ok with someone asking me in this way?”
Work together and appreciate each others strengths.
Together we can thrive as a neurodiverse species - if we learn how to communicate with one another and help get the best out of all our strengths. That's my hope.
Thank you for reading
Mark
Human, Counsellor, Actor, Friend, super visual puzzle mind, creative thinker, dreamer….
Disclaimer: there are other neurodiverse labels I did not talk about here today - Autism being the main one that comes to mind. I have not intentionally excluded reference to this but chose to not speak about it as I have very little experience around autism.
I have also deliberately not used the phrase Neurotypical as I believe it to be language that divides rather than unites people. It comes from the current framework that we (speaking from a western focused society) have created through our schooling system and through the traits that typically have been handy to humanity thus far. There is essentially no "typical" in my opinion, we are all on a radial spectrum of humanity…and that's a great thing.
First written and published for YMCA DLG 03/04/2023